Gateway Tech Support and Too Much Honesty

I called Gateway Technical Support because I finally decided to fix my hard drive issues properly instead of with rubber-bands ( Gateway 200X (200ARC) Lame-O Hard Drive Connector ).

I call up Gateway, and right off the bat I can tell the guy is a little funky. I tell him what my problem was, (a faulty connector,) and he thinks for a while before telling me that I’ll probably have to send in my laptop for service. That’s ok, I think, because I’m still under warranty. But then he tells me to get my credit card ready, because it’ll be $44 for shipping and handling of my laptop both directions. I freak out a little and ask him why I paid all that money for my 3-year warranty. He replies a little too glibly, “Hey, we’ll get’chya any way we can,” and then chuckles.

He then asks for me to confirm my shipping address. “Do you live on 2222 Some Street?” (Names changed to protect the innocent.) What? I thought. That’s not my address, and for a second I thought it was my old California address. I lived there 6 years ago, before ever dealing with Gateway. “How do you know that address?” I asked in somewhat of a panic. “Oh we know everything,” Tech Guy says. “In fact, I even know the hospital where you were born. Do you?” It must of been a rough day, because, still in shock, I replied, “You mean in <Some City>, <Midwestern State>???” “Yup,” he replies. “Really????” I asked, shocked. “NO!” he laughs back at me. It’s at that point I realize the address he spoke of was actually my parents new address in Minneapolis, where I had my laptop shipped a year ago, and not my old California address.

OK, well, that fun over with, he puts me on hold a while he deals with “a shite-load of paperwork”. Then, coming back on the phone, he informs me, “It turns out, we’re just going to send you a new cable assembly.” Worried about paying $44 for a little cable, I ask him, “Am I going to have to pay for shipping for that?” “Nah, he says, we’ll ship that to you for free.” “Great,” I say, relieved. Tech Guy continues, “The reasons it’s free is, that basically your Gateway 200 is a piece of crap. You wouldn’t believe how many calls like this we get for that model.”

“Oh, good. I guess.” I’m left wondering, did Tech Guy bring a flask of something into work today?